Narcissists are always right in their own eyes as they feel they are better than others, their way is always the right way. They think in black and white and there has to be either a winner or a loser in most things, whatever you say they will say the opposite. The narcissist will even argue over really silly, small things just to get their own way, this must make them feel like the winner.They are know it alls but know nothing. It completely resonates with me , i experienced it personally that any arguments ,any reasonings, facts you refer them to are only fuel that flare their fire more strongly ,they end up to use all that very facts,reasons you refer them to,against yourself by their fake,distorted perception of truth,by their twitched, inventory,self benefiting rules they defined for life that only are on their side by their sick minds and in the end you turn out to be the bad one ,the sick minded the cruel ,they have nothing to do with reality,truth ,morals and humanity ,they are made up of their lies, imitations and illusions they live their lies and illusions and expect others to comply with them, in fact force them to do so and this is the problem with them ,nothing is real and right about these inferior,miserable people.
Because they ALWAYS have to be right ..They NEVER LEARN from their mistakes ..So they keep doing the same stupid things OVER AND OVER again.BUT BECAUSE IT IS NOT THEIR FAULT EVER and they THINK they are exempt from the rules that other drivers have to follow, They keep doing the same stupid things over and over again... They are like toddlers trapped in an adult body ... If you tell them they have made a mistake it will cause a little "Temper tantrum" They will NEVER admit they are in the wrong... It is a big "Red flag" when you meet a new person ..The narc is Always an I never a We.... they never claim responsibility... and never admit they are wrong but will call u out even if it was months before!! Such shameful behaviour, they are so barbaric, its useless trying to correct them.The narc can be right for themselves but seriously wrong for a kind, loving honest human being, rise above kind hearts, the narc can stay in their own hell ,while we live a valued life ..
They feel that their ASSUMPTIONS are ALWAYS CORRECT and they NEVER ASK QUESTIONS
The method in this madness: No questions asked means no need for input - and no input means that their beliefs aren't going to be challenged.Do so anyway, and observe them jump to their gaslighting game right away:
"You are wrong."
"Guess what, I have already figured out what's going on."
"Who has asked you?"
"You always have to be right!"
"Silly opinion."
"You should have researched that better."
And so on, and so forth...
They will go word for word for 5 hours until you’re exhausted and damn near passed out trying to reason with them. You walk away feeling like you were just talking to a 7 year old about adult matters.
They want to be right (the last and loudest word) at the expense of being correct (a true outcome).
Why do they accuse others of “you always have to be right” only when you have an opinion?
I’m always accused of “you always have to be right” even only if I express an opinion
It's all projection. They do know that they are wrong, but instead of admitting that they are at fault, they have to shift the blame onto you so they can feel better about themselves. Remember, these games are never about you but about them.
So if they start blaming you for something, that needs to be translated as "I know that I have done that, but since I cannot admit that, I'm in desperate need of a scapegoat now, and you are the one."
The narcissist could have wronged you in the worst way possible and they'll justify it. They'll act like it's the best thing for you except, it's the worst. They act like they've done the greatest thing, whilst they wipe the blade they just pulled from your back.
Very contrary, cynical people, one minute they are hot then they turn cold. Mean/nice ongoing cycle
That's the thing isn't it, we don't want to win we just want to have a peaceful conversation or at least get on with them lol. Not possible with a narcissist, they wear us out so they can become energized.
All we want is to have a good friendly conversation but with them involved it is so impossible
It's so tricky with families some we have to just go low contact with. Keep remembering the narcissist doesn't change, they do get worse as they age and as hard as it is for us try not too take it too personal anymore, they will keep cutting you to the heart. It's almost as if they can't help it sometimes, they have a need to hurt others feelings it seems.
Always stay in reality and true never forget what they did to you forgive yourself for connecting with them, never forgive them just forgive yourself, when you do that you will find answers for everything, you don't need explanations from them all from them, it is a curse and fake you are finally free than all of them.
If you did not know yourself from within, but had made yourself up mostly from the outside without reference to your experience, you would be threatened by different views. You would be threatened not only because they are signs of separateness, but also because you would need to be assured that you made yourself up right. Controllers often tell Spellbreakers, You always have to be right, with the intention of getting them to give up their own view. If someone built his identity backwards and found out he was wrong about anything, what would happen to his identity? To the spellbound, being wrong about anything means likewise being wrong about themselves: an identity-shattering experience. Being wrong does not even seem to be an option to the Spellbound. Their unconscious assumption is, If you're right then I'd have to be wrong, and I'm not. Being right is doubly important to anyone anchored in another via a Pretend Person, because in this circumstance being right annihilates any sign of separateness. Being one up depends upon an assumption of hierarchy that one person is superior to another and therefore won't be challenged about being right.
The need to win exists only because the Spellbound, having made themselves up backwards need to prove they are right.
Controllers need to be right is even greater than his or her need to be honest.
Controllers need to win to prove themselves strong enough and able to withstand Spellbreakers.
Most controllers don't plan to control anyone. Nevertheless they do everything they can to keep their Pretend Person alive and well. When Controllers spot a sign of separateness they are angry and frightened by the appearance of an authentic person, and their response is to try to control the authentic person.
When Controllers encounter Witnesses authenticity particularly in familial relationships they begin to feel the disconnection they are trying to avoid. Consequently besides needing to be right to be one up and to preserve their identities, they need to tighten their grip. Normally when people confront difficult situations they get a grip on themselves by drawing upon their inner resources. But the Controller gets a grip within another. The Controller usually tries to accomplish this by defining the authentic person: You're just trying to get attention, wasting time, and causing a scene.
If their first attempt to tighten their grip is resisted Controllers try even harder, being even more annihilating of the authentic person.
People who return to a controlling relationship nearly always experience even more oppressive behavior, because the Controller re-anchors Teddy, tightening his or her grip within the Witness, making sure that Teddy won't get away again.
To feel securely anchored, the Controller must make room for the Pretend Person in the Witness's body by attempting to diminish make smaller the authentic person who resides there. You're nothing or you're a zero are the kinds of comments that reflect the Controller's desire to erase the Witness. The Controller is compelled to make sure at least in his or her pretend world that there is room for Teddy and that no one else lives within the psychic boundary of the Witness. Even though many Witnesses cling to their own reality and know that they are not really diminished, this kind of abuse in a relationship eventually takes a psychic and physical toll on the recipient.
Controllers need to be right is even greater than his or her need to be honest.
Controllers need to win to prove themselves strong enough and able to withstand Spellbreakers.
Most controllers don't plan to control anyone. Nevertheless they do everything they can to keep their Pretend Person alive and well. When Controllers spot a sign of separateness they are angry and frightened by the appearance of an authentic person, and their response is to try to control the authentic person.
When Controllers encounter Witnesses authenticity particularly in familial relationships they begin to feel the disconnection they are trying to avoid. Consequently besides needing to be right to be one up and to preserve their identities, they need to tighten their grip. Normally when people confront difficult situations they get a grip on themselves by drawing upon their inner resources. But the Controller gets a grip within another. The Controller usually tries to accomplish this by defining the authentic person: You're just trying to get attention, wasting time, and causing a scene.
If their first attempt to tighten their grip is resisted Controllers try even harder, being even more annihilating of the authentic person.
People who return to a controlling relationship nearly always experience even more oppressive behavior, because the Controller re-anchors Teddy, tightening his or her grip within the Witness, making sure that Teddy won't get away again.
To feel securely anchored, the Controller must make room for the Pretend Person in the Witness's body by attempting to diminish make smaller the authentic person who resides there. You're nothing or you're a zero are the kinds of comments that reflect the Controller's desire to erase the Witness. The Controller is compelled to make sure at least in his or her pretend world that there is room for Teddy and that no one else lives within the psychic boundary of the Witness. Even though many Witnesses cling to their own reality and know that they are not really diminished, this kind of abuse in a relationship eventually takes a psychic and physical toll on the recipient.
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